Saturday, February 23, 2013

After Math

Some of the brain may be miswired but it tells you something that my response to my coaches congratulatory email on the marathon was asking about how to make next year better. This would lead into them copying so and so from the running group and hearing the different approaches. It was all good advice and I’ll incorporate it into next year’s training but it was also worth listening to one person’s advice that you shouldn’t tweak too much based on one race. The 3 races in the last 6 months that haven’t been PR’s a 5k, a half marathon, and this marathon were all ones in which I puked after and I sit here and try to diagnose if that’s just medication or anxiety but I also sign up for one after… If anyone thinks its diet, let’s just say that my “I earned it because I ran a marathon” meal shows that it’s not.

But then it was back to time with real life, some emails with attorneys about the custody case. We made one simple change. My next MRI was scheduled for March 18th since the doctor had authorized it for March but we moved it to their first opening on March 4th to if nothing else show that things aren’t growing, that my brain is stable. Kiana has perfect attendance has just been screened for GT. I keep praying, hoping dreaming that cancer and its side effects picked the wrong guy to have a fight with but I think 2 minutes looking at my race results and 10 minutes talking to my daughter will tell you that the areas I’ve focused on the most are doing the best.  With that said, remembering I woke up in an ambulance a few days after the last marathon, I am taking the recovery easier than I have before. I biked 10 miles easy and made sure someone was with me and the two runs after were also accompanied. The first one is a weekly 5k where I’ve come in first with a stroller and this week I was literally dead last. About halfway through it, Kiana looks up and says, aren’t we usually done by now.
I took the two ipods in and one was old enough to where it was just simply battery life and the other was just water damaged… that’ll be the first purchase I make cause I learned quickly during the marathon and during cycling training that I have no clue how people manage to run without music.

But I want to contribute still and learning from one of my actually retired running friends that he volunteers for a math class less than half a mile from my house, I applied to the program about a month ago. I had to have a background check and got approved and went to their orientation yesterday. It occurs to me that despite some memory and language skills being changed, on both Lumosity and in my neuropsychological evaluation, my math skills have never gotten better or worse. I took calculus once upon a time but doubt I could hang there but figured I could help out some 7th graders with math. At the orientation they approved me for the hour and a half week program. There are days I lack confidence in me but it was good to get some of it back

I don’t want to be just about cancer but I do want to continue contributing to the cancer community, both brain and in general. The young adult dinner was a success and people I’ve met there and other places have blood cancer.  In honor of them, I made a contribution to Kiana’s first charity fund raiser and they came in first by $2, raising $325 out of the school’s $1700. Not being a flower guy, I passed one of the sets of flowers from Livestrong weekend. Unlike last year where I noticed no one at the marathon expo had anything in regards to brain cancer, this year I met someone there who had something on their display and someone who gave me a band regarding it. With that said, if you want to make a donation towards my Duke 5k account…

Anyway, I think life still add up to me being a decent runner and being a decent dad. Kiana is the start of the week this week and she got to pick pictures of which ones she wanted to put in for a poster that will go up at school. I was both very uncomfortable (cause I’m not wearing a shirt) and very happy that she picked one from the rogue 30k of us doing the race I’m most proud of. There is an all girls party where apparently I’m going to be the only guy among a bunch of little girl and women and they said, don’t worry we want you to come… you’re girly enough.  With all that once again, the two questions I ask at every medical appointment, am I fit to raise a kid (why I get through the day) and can I keep running (how I get through the day) are answered yes. Today is one of those days where they combine and I get to watch the best marathon finish I’ll ever see. I’ve watched the Olympic one and some tv ones and the local ones but today, today Kiana finishes the last .2 miles of marathon kids. My mom came into town just to watch that. So I like the equation my life is in. 

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