Yet To Be

A couple of friends who read this blog have asked to see “The Boston playlist,” which is locked in and below (make fun of my musical tastes now). While some songs are just on there because they are fun or have a good beat, I’d say over 80% have good emotional connections and o% have bad emotional connections correcting the mistake from Austin. The last one that was added was Eric Hutchinson’s "Oh" because of the lyrics:

“and im never sure what i'm living for but it's always on my mind
someone comes along always proves me wrong think im gonna be fine”

But all the songs are about the present or the future. I went to a Palm Sunday service yesterday which was great and had a testimonial service. Back when I was a pastor and I directed those, I loved those stories but always tried to encourage people to stay more focused on the present and say “what has God done for you lately?.” Some people have great redemption stories but it’s what we do with that redemption that matters most in my book. If the purpose is just to breath well even cancer and parasites are trying to just survive. I put off brain surgery to qualify for Boston but now I also want to do well at Boston. I watched an old interview with Lance Armstrong, someone who had accomplished many things long before his diagnosis and even better ones after and, of course promoting his organization but also explaining why he founded it, he said before cancer I was just living and now I’m living strong. I’ve tried to talk about the ways I’ve changed and tweaked and perhaps been a bit too proud or stubborn in acknowledging that cancer had anything to do with it, even trying to say it was biological changes (which there were some) or shifts and freedom from the divorce (from which there were others). But the simple reality is that I think I liked my life plenty before all this but I like it better now. Someone gave me and someone else a card that said, “a successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” Well that didn’t work out for me with a person but it’s still happening with life and the scar on my head makes me love infinitely more the people like my daughter, my friends and family who stuck through this, fun things like a good party, a good run or a good game more than I ever had.

Boston is two weeks away and then of to new adventures of training for the Century ride of 100 miles begins. Kiana is wanting to ride her bicycle today some more after school (when we get her a helmet). I did a tune up race this weekend, the Zooma women’s half marathon where I came in second to a fast girl and the knee wasn’t too bad. I went from there to the committee that will help put together the Brain Power 5k.

This is going to be part of my reality. The last card I ever handed anyone before Dr. Friedman would go digging into my brain was handing my ex one quoting Emerson, “Come grow old along with me; the best in life is yet to be.” The recipient may have passed on the initial offer but I think the second half still stands. And I am thankful for those who stayed here, those who have entered since then and if and when, those who are still coming. But I hope that I am both always and being part of people’s present and don’t focus too much on anything in the past no matter how good or bad it was. And if that’s one of the symptoms of brain cancer, I’d sing up all over again.

In My Daughter’s Eyes, Martina McBride
My Way, Frank Sinatra
Imagine, John Lennnon
Amazing Grace, Celtic Thunder
The Impossible Dream, Man of La Mancha
Boston, Augustuna
What if I stumble, DC Talk
Life on the Moon, David Cook
Friends Never Say Goodbye, The Road to El Dorado
A Brand New Day, Joshua Radin
Oh, Eric Hutchinson
The Urgency of the Generally Insignificant, Wayne Watson
With My Own Two Hands, Ben Harper
The Time of Your Life, Disney
Feeling Good, Michael Buble
I Just Can’t Wait to Be King, The Lion King
Quiero, Arjona
Razzle Dazzle, Chicago
Ballad of San Francisco, Caedmon’s Call
Mojado, Arjona
Cinderella, Steven Curtis Chapman
My Next Thirty years, Tim McGraw
Bad Bad Leroy Brown, Celtic Thunder
Dance, Caedmon’s Call
Testify to Love, Avalon
Bells of Freedom, Bon Jovi
La Camisa Negra, Juanes
Billie Jean, Michael Jackson
Lonely No More, Rob Thomas
Nice Guys Finish Last, Green Day
Valio La Pena, Marc Anthony
Voodooo Child, Rogue Traders
Thankful, Caedmon’s Call
Handlebars, Flobots
Just the Two of Us, Will Smith
A Dios Le Pido, Juanes
A Little Less Conversation, Elvis Presley
We weren’t Born to Follow, Bon Jovi
I Can’t Decide, Scissor Sisters
Paralyze, Finger Elever
Holding out for a Hero, Frou Frou
What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger, Kelly Clarkson
It’s My Life, Bon Jovi
Lose Yourself, Eminem
Move, MercyMe
This Way, Kanye West
Harder to Breathe, Maroon 5
I’m still Standing, Elton John